Scientists Identify Part of Brain That Lies Fallow When Wife is Around

With potentially massive legal ramifications, scientists in Nova Scotia have identified the portion of the male human brain that lies fallow when the person’s wife is within earshot. The finding comes after three years of study into the odd human behavior that was informally known as “the dude cloud.”

As researchers explain the study, which involved two sets of approximately 350 married men, “the hippocampus of the husbands whose wives were within earshot went noticeably inactive, almost to the point of being semi-catatonic.” The hippocampus is the part of the brain that deals with memory functions, such as when to pick up the kids, the days and times for soccer practice, and how often and when medications should be taken.

Already, criminal defense lawyers and civil litigators are testing out the “Fallow Brain Syndrome” and the “Fallow Brain Defense” in criminal and civil matters, arguing that clients “couldn’t have known better– their wives were there.”

Feminist groups, however, are cautioning people about overgeneralizing the study’s results, saying “common sense told us this long ago. It’s just more of ‘been there, done that,’” said one leading scholar.