Tag Archives: Legislation

In Effort to Reduce Spending, U.S. House Votes to “Eliminate All Vegetation”

In a concerted effort to reduce government spending, the Republican-led U.S House of Representatives has voted to “eliminate all vegetation on or around government buildings and near government-funded structures.”

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Uniform Commission to Draft Children’s Playground Rules

The Uniform Law Commission announced today that it has formed a committee to review and recommend uniform playground rules, saying “the time is right to bring clarity and stability to a confusing and rapidly changing aspect of childhood.”

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Republicans Introduce Legislation to Eliminate Weekends, Expand Child Labor

In a legal battle being defined by sharp protests on both sides, the Republican-controlled U.S. House has introduced legislation that would eliminate weekends and allow children over the age of ten to work at least 30 hours each week in “wage-producing employment.” Families earning more than $300,000 annually, however, would be exempt from most of the bill’s requirements.

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Jury’s Verdict to Lawyers: “We Don’t Give a F*ck Whether the iPad or Android Tablet is Better”

Having listened to hours of testimony about the iPad and its competitors, a jury returns a verdict of “f#ck off.”

Local Attorney Goes Out of Business After Forgetting to Practice Law

A local attorney acknowledged this week that his law firm failed because he forgot to practice law. It’s the third reported instance this year of “forgetting to practice,” prompting some professional liability insurers to lower insurance rates for newer attorneys because of the lack of potential claims.

New Lawyer Networking Site Promises to Deliver All the Crappy Things the Other Ones Did

A newly launched online lawyer networking site has promised to deliver all the crappy features that every other failed lawyer networking site has delivered, according to lawyers behind the launch.

Lawyer Receives Prestigious Award for Tweeting Excellence

An Alabama lawyer has received one of the top legal awards for professional excellence because of extensive tweeting, a bar association trade magazine reported Wednesday.

Scientists Identify Part of Brain That Lies Fallow When Wife is Around

With potentially massive legal ramifications, scientists in Nova Scotia have identified the portion of the male human brain that lies fallow when the person’s wife is within earshot. The finding comes after three years of study into the odd human behavior that was informally known as “the dude cloud.”

Experts Predict “Strong Growth” in Lawyers Debating Merits of iPad

Legal practice management and technology experts are predicting “continued strong growth” in the new legal subspecialty known as “is the iPad a good tool for lawyers,” according to a report released yesterday from Shiny Things Daily.